Omintifyatt is a god.
It takes the form of a blubbery, all-powerful
yak.
Omintifyatt created gold six quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Omintifyatt, it will give you lots of gold.
If you do not believe in
Omintifyatt, it will turn you into a sheep.
Omintifyatt's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.
Omintifyatt's Holy Commandments1. Never talk about fire.
2. Never talk about solid mechanics.
3. Your children must be taught to worship Omintifyatt.
4. Always pray immersed in water.
5. Never feed cucumbers to birds while wearing turquoise ear rings.