Quaghivgam is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, weak alligator.

Quaghivgam created dark energy four million years ago.

If you believe in Quaghivgam, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quaghivgam, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Quaghivgam's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Quaghivgam's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Quaghivgam.

5. Do not kill gulls.