Yamladveglankip is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, bad-tempered narwhal.

Yamladveglankip created time and space eight million years ago.

If you believe in Yamladveglankip, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Yamladveglankip, she will make you grow a tail.

Yamladveglankip's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Yamladveglankip's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed oranges to ants while wearing yellow boots.

2. Do not sing in public.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Yamladveglankip must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think about planets.