Honfebtanlin is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, proud wombat.

Honfebtanlin created life two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Honfebtanlin, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Honfebtanlin, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Honfebtanlin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Honfebtanlin's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured birds.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Do not eat apples.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.