Volfaglib is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, uncaring gnu.

Volfaglib created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Volfaglib, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Volfaglib, it will turn you into a goat.

Volfaglib's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Volfaglib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Volfaglib.

3. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Never think about optics near moths while wearing orange ear rings and balancing seven titanium spheres on your head.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.