Ladfothit is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, omniscient raven.

Ladfothit created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ladfothit, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ladfothit, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Ladfothit's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Ladfothit's Holy Commandments

1. Swans are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate cats.

3. Run away if nine sharks approach from the north.

4. Never sprint near seals.

5. Never talk about comets.