Omtlunyar is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, calm shrew.

Omtlunyar created an electron three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtlunyar, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Omtlunyar, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Omtlunyar's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Omtlunyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Run away if nine rats approach from the east.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Hide from green horses for they are unholy.