Vedominlab is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, almighty squirrel.

Vedominlab created matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Vedominlab, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vedominlab, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Vedominlab's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Vedominlab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no mice in a building before entering it.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never play with disobedient children.