Tarpflismut is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, fast raven.

Tarpflismut created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tarpflismut, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Tarpflismut, he will turn you into a worm.

Tarpflismut's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Tarpflismut's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three tin sculptures of Tarpflismut on top of important buildings.

2. Never paint your hands violet.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never look at nebulae.