Bapsis is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, self-assured parrot.

Bapsis created the solar system four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bapsis, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bapsis, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Bapsis' most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Bapsis' Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Never talk about chlorophyll.

3. Bapsis must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never write about comets.