Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humane mole.

Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud created Europe two years ago.

If you believe in Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Never paint your neck magenta.

4. Always wear red.

5. Put Mabgampidnurtbetbonkfud first in all things.
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