Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, flying alligator.

Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas created viruses eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas' most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never feed lots of cherries to badgers while wearing green kilts.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

5. Gonxindad Kenbonhudfas loves turtles, so they must be honoured.