Wotbommum is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, irritating hyena.

Wotbommum created the Sun five million years ago.

If you believe in Wotbommum, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Wotbommum, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wotbommum's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Wotbommum's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never write about enzymes.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

5. Never think about dwarf planets.