Tailtapbud is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, egotistical raccoon.

Tailtapbud created the planet Mars twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tailtapbud, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Tailtapbud, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tailtapbud's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Tailtapbud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear carbon on your body.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never talk about dark matter near mites while wearing orange jumpers.

5. Never eat wheat.