Fubzennurt is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, staggering squirrel.

Fubzennurt created snails seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fubzennurt, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Fubzennurt, she will turn you into a slug.

Fubzennurt's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Fubzennurt's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat corn.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Never feed bread to otters while wearing turquoise hats.

4. Do not wear indigo clothing.

5. Never write about quantum mechanics.