Faspogquimkon Queegtit is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, omniscient clam.

Faspogquimkon Queegtit created bats six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Faspogquimkon Queegtit, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Faspogquimkon Queegtit, she will strike you with lightening.

Faspogquimkon Queegtit's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Faspogquimkon Queegtit's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of bananas to birds while wearing turquoise shorts.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never eat oranges.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Fast once a month.