Bedstigtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, thoughtless lizard.

Bedstigtetti created a top quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bedstigtetti, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bedstigtetti, it will manifest in front of you.

Bedstigtetti's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Bedstigtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Bedstigtetti must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.