Bifhoghat is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unjust jackal.

Bifhoghat created a strange quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bifhoghat, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bifhoghat, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Bifhoghat's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Bifhoghat's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never think ill of sick seals.

3. Erect four aluminium sculptures of Bifhoghat on top of important buildings.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not dye your hair purple.