Artbidwot is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, cheerful narwhal.

Artbidwot created a photon eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Artbidwot, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Artbidwot, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Artbidwot's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Artbidwot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never eat peas.

3. Never hop in the presence of goats.

4. Always obey Artbidwot's priests.

5. Erect three tin sculptures of Artbidwot on top of important buildings.