Quamdibbud is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, fussy lion.

Quamdibbud created the world seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quamdibbud, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Quamdibbud, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Quamdibbud's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Quamdibbud's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five otters approach from the west.

2. Do not speak about cucumbers.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.