Hadxuckdab is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, narcissistic manatee.

Hadxuckdab created the universe seven million years ago.

If you believe in Hadxuckdab, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Hadxuckdab, he will curse you with boils.

Hadxuckdab's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Hadxuckdab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat peas.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Put Hadxuckdab first in all things.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hadxuckdab.