Zanlenquag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, tranquil hare.

Zanlenquag created Europe nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Zanlenquag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zanlenquag, she will turn you into a frog.

Zanlenquag's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Zanlenquag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near birds while wearing cyan rings and balancing eight carbon spheres on your legs.

2. Retreat if nine frogs approach from the east.

3. Do not chant in public.

4. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Zanlenquag in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not drink alcohol.