Quillbifbigdumdampon is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, deceitful penguin.

Quillbifbigdumdampon created an atom nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillbifbigdumdampon, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Quillbifbigdumdampon, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Quillbifbigdumdampon's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Quillbifbigdumdampon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate birds.

3. Do not take Quillbifbigdumdampon's name in vain.

4. Whales are not to be trusted.

5. Always make sure there are no mice in a room before entering it.
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