Narthuntarg is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, prudent fly.

Narthuntarg created the world six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Narthuntarg, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Narthuntarg, he will turn you into a rock.

Narthuntarg's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Narthuntarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Never feed carrots to tapirs while wearing stockings.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity near turtles while wearing mauve rings.