Bommidfem is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, compassionate ferret.

Bommidfem created the Large Magellanic Cloud four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bommidfem, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bommidfem, it will remove you from existence.

Bommidfem's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Bommidfem's Holy Commandments

1. Bommidfem loves foxes, so they must be honoured.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate pigs.

3. Never eat bark.

4. You must pray to Bommidfem five times a day.

5. Do not dye your hair turquoise.