Fidtitflan is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, self-assured dog.

Fidtitflan created dark matter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fidtitflan, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fidtitflan, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Fidtitflan's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Fidtitflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not listen to music.