Sawmigtaglarg is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unselfish porpoise.

Sawmigtaglarg created dark matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawmigtaglarg, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Sawmigtaglarg, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Sawmigtaglarg's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Sawmigtaglarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Retreat if four foxes approach from the west.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.