Lenruttpod is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, merciful seal.

Lenruttpod created matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lenruttpod, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Lenruttpod, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Lenruttpod's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Lenruttpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of beans to monkeys while wearing mauve boots.

2. Do not kill manatees.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Lenruttpod loves geese, so they must be honoured.

5. Never eat bark.