Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, passionate octopus.

Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak created carbon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Cudcepnigruttbopmatrak's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck blue.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never talk about manatees.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.