Gonmondod is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, all-powerful gorilla.

Gonmondod created time and space nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonmondod, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gonmondod, it will make you grow a tail.

Gonmondod's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Gonmondod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill squirrels.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never jump in the presence of ants.

4. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.