Bafrippad is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, duplicitous salamander.

Bafrippad created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafrippad, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Bafrippad, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bafrippad's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Bafrippad's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Bafrippad.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near dogs while wearing turquoise jumpers and balancing six silicon spheres on your arms.