Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, competent donkey.

Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov created parasitic wasps five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never talk about quantum field theory.

3. Worship no other gods but Cetnellhugvigzanniggutgov.

4. Feed all hungry squirrels.

5. Never sing in holy places.