Teenduncettofbudomtzed is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, witty jaguar.

Teenduncettofbudomtzed created Europe four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Teenduncettofbudomtzed, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Teenduncettofbudomtzed, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Teenduncettofbudomtzed's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Teenduncettofbudomtzed's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never feed spinach to ducks while wearing red dresses.

3. Always wear yellow.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.
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