Wanlapceb Lapnakgup is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, stupid fairy.

Wanlapceb Lapnakgup created a strange quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wanlapceb Lapnakgup, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Wanlapceb Lapnakgup, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Wanlapceb Lapnakgup's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Wanlapceb Lapnakgup's Holy Commandments

1. Wanlapceb Lapnakgup loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never talk about solid mechanics near birds while wearing indigo hats.

4. Never talk about black holes.

5. Retreat if nine sheep approach from the east.