Binbapdid is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, slow goblin.

Binbapdid created a top quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Binbapdid, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Binbapdid, it will turn you into a rock.

Binbapdid's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Binbapdid's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never talk about bats.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always help tortoises.