Xengodzan is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, pitiless penguin.

Xengodzan created an electron two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xengodzan, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Xengodzan, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Xengodzan's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Xengodzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in holy places.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never eat bark.