Hivcibjinaf is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, intelligent bird.

Hivcibjinaf created parasitic wasps six million years ago.

If you believe in Hivcibjinaf, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hivcibjinaf, he will strike you with lightening.

Hivcibjinaf's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Hivcibjinaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about enzymes.

2. Run away if eight sharks approach from the east.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Always make sure there are no snails in a room before entering it.