Lapnelvil is a god.
He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unfair
squirrel.
Lapnelvil created the world six million years ago.
If you believe in
Lapnelvil, he will look on you favourably.
If you do not believe in
Lapnelvil, he will turn you into a worm.
Lapnelvil's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.
Lapnelvil's Holy Commandments1. Do not kill tapirs.
2. Never wear shirts.
3. Never feed lots of rice to whales while wearing orange skirts.
4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.
5. Never wear blue hats.