Hadtabmotfitjonster is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, slow narwhal.

Hadtabmotfitjonster created the Sunflower Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadtabmotfitjonster, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Hadtabmotfitjonster, she will refuse to believe in you.

Hadtabmotfitjonster's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Hadtabmotfitjonster's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

2. Never feed carrots to doves while wearing kilts.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Hadtabmotfitjonster loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hadtabmotfitjonster.