Narmegdon is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, confident seal.

Narmegdon created bats three billion years ago.

If you believe in Narmegdon, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Narmegdon, she will turn you into a dog.

Narmegdon's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Narmegdon's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never talk about optics.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

5. Do not make images of living things.