Dagtofart is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, weak aardvark.

Dagtofart created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Dagtofart, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Dagtofart, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dagtofart's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Dagtofart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. You must love Dagtofart.

3. Do not hurt grasshopers.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Dagtofart on top of all buildings.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.