Fumbidhad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, irritating wombat.

Fumbidhad created a top quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumbidhad, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fumbidhad, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Fumbidhad's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Fumbidhad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

2. Never wear purple stockings.

3. Never talk about squirrels.

4. Hide from fawn swans for they are unholy.

5. Never eat green fruit.