Som is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, pitiless goat.

Som created parasitic wasps eight million years ago.

If you believe in Som, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Som, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Som's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Som's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Som on top of all buildings.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Feed all hungry capybaras.

4. Do not take Som's name in vain.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate foxes.