Betstanzed is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, wise duck.

Betstanzed created humanity nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Betstanzed, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Betstanzed, he will throw large rocks at you.

Betstanzed's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Betstanzed's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Betstanzed's priests.

2. Erect a large silver sculpture of Betstanzed on top of all buildings.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

4. Never go into blue rooms.

5. Never wear cyan stockings.