Zogyartwab is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, sage human.

Zogyartwab created light eight million years ago.

If you believe in Zogyartwab, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Zogyartwab, he will not care.

Zogyartwab's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Zogyartwab's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Zogyartwab.

2. Never go into violet rooms.

3. You must love Zogyartwab.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never think about dwarf planets.