Han is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, slow warg.

Han created the world seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Han, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Han, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Han's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Han's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never talk about black holes.

4. Do not eat turnips.

5. Respect your elders.