Wablakab is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, self-confident swan.

Wablakab created Africa eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wablakab, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wablakab, she will cry a lot.

Wablakab's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Wablakab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum mechanics.

2. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Wablakab in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never think about solid mechanics.

5. Never paint your hands yellow.