Kimcapgov Kombellquag is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, vain shark.

Kimcapgov Kombellquag created humankind two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimcapgov Kombellquag, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kimcapgov Kombellquag, it will turn you into a slug.

Kimcapgov Kombellquag's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Kimcapgov Kombellquag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never feed cherries to frogs while wearing violet hats.

3. Never feed lots of parsnips to hamsters while wearing white dresses.

4. Retreat if nine eagles approach from the east.

5. Do not kill birds.