Ladrapwit is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, thoughtless giraffe.

Ladrapwit created time and space three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladrapwit, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Ladrapwit, it will laugh at you.

Ladrapwit's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Ladrapwit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Ladrapwit.