Nurrenkad is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, able crane.

Nurrenkad created a quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurrenkad, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nurrenkad, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nurrenkad's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Nurrenkad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Never mention birds.

3. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

4. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

5. You must never eat cherries.